The Patron Saint of TV Dinners

Or: Roman Apple Cake-- Whatever That Is.

I can't remember if I was five or six when I first saw her standing on top of my neighbor's tv set, but I remember the feeling of not being able to look away. She was tiny-- no more than a few inches tall-- but her presence was large enough to pull my focus away from the action on the screen to her absolute stillness above it.

When I asked my friend's Joey’s mother why there was a statue of The Virgin Mary on top of their Sylvania, she corrected me in a tone which faintly suggested that her family were better Catholics than mine would ever be. "That’s not the Virgin Mary, it's St. Clare of Assisi-- the patron saint of television.” Her voice rose at the end of that sentence which made it sound as if she were asking the question, “And why hasn’t your mother taken the time to teach you about important Catholic saints and martyrs?”

Probably because she was tired from working. And because she grew up Lutheran.

---